How do we escape, yet live our lives?
<b>Title:</b> How Do We Escape, Yet Live Our Lives?
<b>Pairings:</b> JaeHo/YooJae, YooSu, ChangTa/KeiMin, Min7en, Min/Siwon, Min/Heechul, Siwon/Heechul
<b>Rating:</b> 18 - (sexual content and language)
<b>Genre:</b> Everything, Love, Life, Romance, lust, sex, violence, drug addiction.
<b>Summary:</b> This is basically about the boys and their lives and all the ups and downs, highs and lows, their problems etc like a soap/drama hehe :D
<b>Disclaimer:</b> I don't own the boys, nor do they know i am writing this, even though i wish i did own them! lol! *dirty mind - drools*
~ Prologue ~
~ Chapter 1 ~ Reality Bites
~ Chapter 2 ~ Slippery Slopes
~ Chapter 3 ~ The Loss Of Me ~
~ Chapter 4 ~ Meetings ~
~ Chapter 5 ~ Tea Stains ~
~ Chapter 6 ~ Love In The Ice ~
~ Chapter 7 ~ Torn ~ Part 1 ~
~ Chapter 7 ~ Torn ~ Part 2 ~
~ Chapter 8 ~ Rough Diamond ~
~ Chapter 9 ~ Wild Child ~
~ In Between Time ~ Pt 1. Pt 2. Pt 3.
~ Chapter 10 ~ The Truth Will Out ~ Pt 1. Pt 2.
~ Chapter 11 ~ Picking Up The Pieces ~
~ Chapter 12 ~ Fallen Angel ~
~ Chapter 13 ~ The Power Of Love ~
~ Chapter 14 ~ 마지막 인사 (Majimak Insa) ~
~ Chapter 15 ~ Cherry Blossoms ~
~ Chapter 16 ~ Hope For The Future ~
~ Chapter 17 ~ One Day The Insane Shall Win… ~ (Alternative Ending)
~ Chapter 14 ~마지막인사 (Majimak Insa)(Last Goodbye) ~
3 months after all the madness of Jaejoong’s attempted suicide. Things had finally been going along, normally, the boys all attended their lectures and worked, met up often and had a generally nice time. Yunho and JaeJoong had moved into a small place near Yunho’s family home. The other boys all fairly frequently went to Yunho’s lavish house to have dinner hosted by his parents. Sometimes they even threw parties for even the families as well. Everyone had seemingly turned into one big extended family, but they were all happy, nonetheless. Everything seemed too good to be true, for all of them.
One crisp spring morning.
‘brring brrrring’ was the sound Yunho’s phone made as it nearly vibrated off th side table, luckily a hand shot out and caught it just in time.
“yobeoseyo? Appa? …. Eung….eung… ne, ne, I will come now then, bye.” ‘Click’
Yunho sat up in bed and wrote a little note for jaejoong as he looked so peaceful just lying there, who thought heaven could taste so sweet? Yunho thought to himself, as he stared for what seemed like an eternity at Jaejoong’s pale and perfectly set features, whilst sleeping.
He got up and swiftly got dressed and drove as fast as he could to his family home, he father had said that his mother was unwell and that he needed to come home, ‘that’s odd’ he thought to himself whilst driving, ‘omma, never seemed ill, why is she suddenly ill?.... hmm….. although now that I think about it, when I have seen her over the past few months she has been coughing a lot and seeming a bit paler… oh god.’
When he got there, everything seemed fine, his mother was just in bed, resting, the doctor was still on his way, and his father had informed him when he arrived home. “Dad, what’s wrong with mum?”
“son, we need to show you a letter, then you will know, what is wrong” sighed the troubled man, as he led Yunho up to their room, where his mother lay, she embraced her son tightly, she looked well enough…. Yunho thought, but was coughing a lot still and it sounded deathly.
Yunho’s father handed him the letter, it was from the hospital. The letter stated that the results of her blood tests, 3 months ago had confirmed the worst, she had lung cancer it was in the advanced stages already and the drugs she was taking for it, only helped a tiny amount, there was nothing else that could be done, and they had caught it too late.
Yunho froze, he didn’t understand what was going on, and he fell to his knees. His brain was frantically scrambling for an answer to what had happened, why? Since when? Why didn’t they tell him?... yes! Why hadn’t they told him?
Yunho looked up at his parents as they sat there on the bed, tears involuntarily streaming down his face, “w..wh…why..why? why didn’t you lot tell me before?” he managed before he covered his face with his hands and tried to wipe the flood of tears.
“Yunho, my son, we chose not to tell you, because we didn’t want this to have a negative effect on your time left with me, many things have been happening recently and we didn’t want to disrupt that, well not prematurely at least, I want to see all the boys again btw please.” His mother said softly and calmly, which was accompanied by a warm smile and a loving tight embrace to her dearly loved child.
“Please understand Yunho, we did it like this, to protect you, for the maximum time, possible.” His father said to him.
“I… I suppose I can see why…. But how have you got this illness!? How? Why? I mean is there really nothing that can be done? I can’t lose you mum, you and dad are everything to me! Please don’t leave me…” Yunho eventually managed to say to his mother as he sobbed uncontrollably into her neck.
“No one knows why I got this, Yunhoyah, sometimes these things just happen, and there’s nothing that can be done to prevent it, nor stop it, thus is life, I have always taught you that, life is how it is….’she paused’… Yunho, I would like for Changmin, to write out and read a little speech at my funeral, I know this is the worst time to talk about this, but you know how I am, and things need to be done.”
Yunho slowly stopped sobbing, and nodded his head, his parents were strong and dutiful, they did what was needed, no matter how hard things were, they just carried on, that’s how the Jung’s were, that’s how they had become so rich and powerful.
“Changmin is the best storyteller, I know that, I have read his stuff. I would also like Yoochun, to put together some music and also a playlist, my favourite music please, I would like you and jaejoong, to be there at the front, my family. Junsu and Dong-wook, can sing this song please, as well.” She handed him a piece of old paper, on it were lyrics to a hymn. Yunho recognised it, but couldn’t recall form where he had heard it before. Reading through the lyrics, tears welled up again, but he fought them back and instead nodded. He gave his mother a kiss and a hug, he hugged his father goodbye and set off to the coffee shop where he had texted the boys to meet him asap.
He told the boys, there over a mix of sweet smoothies, healing tea and bitter coffee.
Silence reigned for what seemed eternity.
They just sat there, holding hands and thinking, considering and wondering about the future.
3 weeks later and Yunho’s mother’s health had deteriorated so much so that she was in the hospital. The boys all came and visited her. “Boys! Welcome, I have missed you all! Thank you for seeing me, one last time. I know I haven’t long for this world Junsu don’t you start crying now you hear!...good lad. I also want to thank you all, you are all amazing boys and I just have this to say, I love you all like you were my own sons. Never give up on love, each other, yourselves and lead full and exciting lives! Please!” with that she smiled a motherly smile and everyone deeply bowed to Mrs Jung.
“We love you too Mrs Jung! And thank you for everything!” the boys all returned in unison.
They all got about to eating and chatting like normal, until visiting hours were over and only Mr and Mrs Jung were left alone, in the soft light above the bed.
“Darling, thank you for enriching my life, thank you for giving me a beautiful and strong and handsome son. I will love you forever and I will see you again, in the next world.”
Yunho’s father stated as he lay on the bed next to his wife, looking deeply into her chestnut eyes.
She smiled and returned the sentiments. They kissed goodbye and hugged all night, smiles painted on their faces.
Morning broke and the monitor was silent now. Mrs Jung had passed.
A few days later on that Sunday, the funeral was held. The dress code was white and black, flowers were to be purple; Mrs Jung’s favourite colours.
Mr Jung was dressed all in black except for a dark purple tie and a white rose. Yunho was wearing a black suit, white shirt and black tie with a black flower. Jaejoong had a white blazer on with a purple flower in his lapel, with a black shirt and tie. Junsu and Yoochun wore white with black shirts. Finally Dong-wook and Changmin wore black suits with white shirts and white ties. Everyone one had purple flowers.
The procession was slow and steady. The day was cool and calm, it was a fine spring afternoon and the wind only blew enough to caress everyone’s woes.
The church was grand and ornate. It was outside of Seoul and had large grounds. Many beautiful marble statues dotted the landscape as did expertly crafted gardens.
The service went smoothly. Yunho’s father spoke, Yunho spoke and finally it was time for Changmin to speak. The boy stepped up to the podium, checked his speech and the microphone.
Changmin cleared his throat and began:
“Mrs Jung asked me to write something for this moment and well, Ahh it took me a while to do, I hope It does her proud and well, I hope it touch you all, in some small way. Mrs Jung was a beautiful person, both inside and out. She was remarkable and kind and perfect.”
His speech went:
“Some believe that death, is only the beginning, the beginning of what though?
The beginning of a new journey…
The beginning of the end of a life.
But I will say this: lets cry and wail for the departed and move on, for this is what they would have wanted us to do, lets laugh about the good and fun times that we had all shared together, let’s remember that person, or those people that were once a part of our daily or even occasional life, let’s not get lost within that black hole of despair and loss, for they are not here to bring us back from the brink of our own destruction.
So let’s not destroy ourselves because of the loss that we have suffered, let’s just remember the good times, and remember those who we loved and who loved us in return, lets mourn not the loss of that person, lets mourn the bereavement the world has suffered along with us, for the dead will always be with us, they are kept, locked inside our hearts, our memories, our bodies and our souls, even in the possessions too.
They would want us to carry on with our lives and be happy. Let us remember them.
So please, let’s all just hope and pray, that our beloved ones will find their way to the gates of heaven, up in the celestial realm, and that they set the stars ablaze with their undying love and affection for… us, those who they left behind and who now watch over us…. One day we shall we reunited …..Thank You.”
With that he sat back down after bowing to the coffin.
Junsu and Dong-wook moved to the front now. Yoochun had moved off to the side to set the music playing.
The piece was called Miya. It was Mrs Jung’s name. it was a hauntingly beautiful aria, special yet sad however it somehow managed to be imbued with the feelings of a warm yet magical mid-summer night.
The boys began to sing, Junsu first, then Dong-wook, then together. Their voices soared and dipped gracefully like a dove in flight. The music ended and the mysterious aria the boys sang ended soon after.
Silence reigned and there wasn’t a dry eye in the building.
Everyone moved outside and the coffin was lowered into the ground. Yunho, his father and the boys all dropped their flowers on top of the oak box, along with a handful of dirt.
They all moved away slowly now one by one, friends, family, acquaintances and co-workers.
The boys went off to their cars to go back to the Jung family home for the wake. Mr Jung and Yunho stood there, staring and staring into nothingness, they could almost see her through the box they were staring so hard.
“Goodbye my love. Rest now for all eternity.” Mr Jung said quietly, with that he walked off with a pat to Yunho’s shoulder.
20 minutes had passed; one other person and car remained. Jaejoong was sitting in the car staring out at Yunho, he wanted to run to him so badly but his boyfriend had told him he needed to make his goodbye alone.
Yunho collapsed to the ground sobbing violently. “Omma, Ommmmaaahah….I love you… I… I need you here with me…. with us all…. Where are you now? Are you happy? Are you pain free? … If you are, then, then… I can be happier…. Are you watch…watching us..?.....”
He carried on crying there for what seemed like forever.
Eventually he said quietly and clearly: “mother, I will do my best for you and for everyone, I will always love you. Thank you for everything. Thank you for giving me life and raising me well. Thank you for showing me how to love without bounds; and thank you for loving me for me.”
He wiped away the tears and got up and walked to the waiting car and jaejoong, who gave him a soft smile as he got into the car. Hugging, they watched the graveyard and the beautiful church disappear into the distance.
The wake was a fairly lively affair, Mrs Jung’s favourite music was being played and food and drink were being happily consumed as people chatted happily reminiscing about the late, great Mrs Miya Jung.
“It looks like your speech touched everyone babe, well done, it was beautiful. I love you.” Dong-wook said to Changmin as they embraced each other by the stairs. The other boys gathered around and chatted about various things and the ceremony.
Eventually they all retired to bed after the last of the guests had left. Everyone slept deeply that night.